You know full well that there are not nearly enough Monty Python references here at RogueMoney.net.
Before this blog turns into a #BashCalifornia free-for-all (you can do that in the Comments section), let’s go straight to the horse’s mouth and see just exactly what California is complaining about this time.
The website YesCalifornia.org seems to be playing homebase to the current incarnation of the #CalExit secessionist movement. By the way, California gets this chigger stuck up her butt once every few years, about as often as the warning about the imminent “Big One” to bust loose along the San Andreas.
According to the website, if the initiative gets passed in 2018, then a special election will be held in the Spring of 2019. At that time, state voters will decide Yay or Nay on whether to secede from the United States. So that’s about 26 months from now. For a state whose collective attention span is about equal to that of a gnat’s, 26 months is an eternity. In fact, by the time you get to the end of this blog, the movement may have fizzled out. But I digress.
I read further down that homepage to discover what is California’s whine du jour. Now, forgive me if I am missing something here, but I thought the fire that lit California’s fuse was the fact that Donald J. Trump just became president, and California feels that suicide would be preferable, right? However, as I read down their list of gripes, it seems to me that the policies that have supposedly destroyed the Golden State were enacted, not by the Trump regime, but by the Bushista-Clinton-Obama reigns of terror, yes? This makes no sense whatsoever.
See for yourself:
1. PEACE AND SECURITY
The U.S. Government spends more on its military than the next several countries combined. Not only is California forced to subsidize this massive military budget with our taxes, but Californians are sent off to fight in wars that often do more to perpetuate terrorism than to abate it. The only reason terrorists might want to attack us is because we are part of the United States and are guilty by association. Not being a part of that country will make California a less likely target of retaliation by its enemies.
(uhhh, yeah, that would be Obama, not Trump. Furthermore, if Hillary had won, the Middle East would have become one giant pothole by now.)
2. ELECTIONS AND GOVERNMENT
California’s electoral votes haven’t affected a presidential election since 1876. On top of that, presidential election results are often known before our votes are even counted. So, why should we keep subjecting ourselves to presidents we play no role in electing, to 382 representatives and 98 senators we can’t vote for, and all the government officials and federal judges appointed by those very same people we don’t elect.
(ok so now you’re blaming the fact that the Sun sets in the west, so, by the time Californians get off work to head for the voting booths on Election Day, the rest of the nation is finished voting and nobody cares anymore. And your secession from the Union would change the earth’s rotation around the sun, how, exactly?)
3. TRADE AND REGULATION
The U.S. Government maintains a burdensome trade system that hurts California’s economy by making trade more difficult and more expensive for California’s businesses. As long as California remains within this burdensome trade system, we will never be able to capitalize on the trade and investment opportunities that would be available to us as an independent country. On top of that, the United States is dragging California into the Trans-Pacific Partnership agreement which conflicts with our values.
(California: are you even listening to what you’re saying? About TPP: TRUMP JUST NIXED IT, YOU MORONS. I thought you read the NY Times ? Oh wait, you can’t read. That’s covered down in point #9.) Skipping forward for brevity …
8. HEALTH AND MEDICINE
The Affordable Care Act was enacted by the U.S. Government to lower the cost of health care and expand health insurance coverage to the uninsured, yet millions of Californians still lack access to quality health care because they can’t afford it.
(This is making my head hurt … You do realize that the “Affordable Care Act” is otherwise known as OBAMAcare, right? You do understand why it’s called OBAMAcare, right? Not TRUMPcare. OBAMAcare. Sheesh, what is WRONG WITH YOU, California?) And that brings us to Point #9.
California has some of the best universities but in various ways, our schools are among the worst in the country…. Independence means we will be able to fully fund public education, rebuild and modernize public schools, and pay public school teachers the salaries they deserve. On top of that, independence means freedom from federal education policies and one-size-fits-all standards set by political appointees on the other side of the continent.
(Hello, California? Anybody home? Trump is the guy who wants to ELIMINATE the Department of Education. You just said that’s what you want. What …? … How …? … oh never mind.)
Ok, we’re done here. California you clearly don’t know what the heck you want or what you’re doing. So, go ahead and leave. We can’t help you when you’re like this. You do realize that your 95 Theses don’t even explain exactly what type of money you plan to invent for your new republic? What are you gonna do, adopt the currency used by the entities who manage your seaports? The future gold-backed Chinese yuan?
Hey wait a minute … Did China put you up to this?
Come to think of it, this whole #CalExit thing got started the MINUTE Trump won the election. Anybody who’s ever lived in California knows that NOTHING gets started that fast. Hmmm….
More Youtube clips and Twitter posts to enlighten you, or at least entertain you, on the #CalExit business:
California Considering Legislation To Become First Ever Sanctuary State https://t.co/zroiAGL4Jm
— zerohedge (@zerohedge) February 1, 2017
I first heard about this a few months ago and thought “Wtf this is stupid” But now….. lol bitch im ready. https://t.co/wH88G39S1E
— . (@biebxarih) January 30, 2017
— Yes California (@YesCalifornia) January 31, 2017
— The Tylt (@TheTylt) February 2, 2017
CALIFORNIA: Are you ready to secede from the United States? #Calexit
— Yes California (@YesCalifornia) November 9, 2016
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